March222014

fucking poem

idle thoughts idling through my head

drifting listlessly with no direction

and no reality but subjective perception

.

aimless things ambling amiably along

streets that go nowhere or somewhere that is back there

wandering minstrels who’ve forgotten their song

.

we’re many of us playing with instruments broken

hopeless and strumming discordantly humming

waiting for an audience, but no one is coming

January192014
2PM
January162014

Benching light and my anterior deltoids are fucking toast.
So light anyway,  fuck you Wendler. Fuck you too, shoulders.

5/3/1 

December292013

I will die here
Alone with the curtains drawn
In a sparsely furnished room
Lying uncovered atop a hard mattress filled with an ache which permeates the entirety of the small room which will be my coffin.
Nothing happens and nobody comes.
And nobody notices.

December242013
Got these fakies is south east asia…#chucktaylors

Got these fakies is south east asia…#chucktaylors

November242013

i sit here

yet again

and do this

stuff

that kills me

kills me

and i float through

right through you

and through me 

through me

too

and there’s nothing there

and there’s nothing here

and there’s nothing

anywhere

and there’s no you

and there’s just me

and there’s no you

here for me

7PM

i fall down

i fall down so slowly

i reach out to those few

and those few aren’t there

there’s not much

but so much but

nothing for me

here

so many options that

connections allude me

when we’re all the same

and i’m just the same

November102013

you lie to me
with where you put your hand
but i can’t let it be
and I’m so sorry

when it courses through your veins
the beat moves to me
I wish you’d want the same
you pretend not to see

but when you’re fucked up you want me
all the time i want to see you 
but you don’t want to know me
until it suits your needs

when the drugs pump from her stomach through her digestive system she gets clingy and wants to hold onto you. she’ll kiss you if you move slightly. any other time she’ll dodge carefully but be there just enough. just enough. breakfast is she’s hungry or shopping if she needs to, but always at her convenience.

and that’s almost okay except for the advances in a certain frame of mind that just keep it going in your mind. 

when i ask where we are and you say nothing and i say it’s not okay and you say it’ll be okay

same again

same same but different

slow learner slow learner slow




pancake manor

green stick fracture

clean break

chasing

goodbye Alyssa

November12013
Some weird VIP thing at the family nightclub. Free vodka for 2 hours. k

Some weird VIP thing at the family nightclub. Free vodka for 2 hours. k

October232013

So much of my energy is being put into not knocking out my supervisor at work.
It’s very stressful.

October222013
New visor selfie

New visor selfie

October72013
Breakfastsssssss

Breakfastsssssss

October62013
Photos of everything coz I lost my phone in a cab last night and the driver just dropped it off at my house!

Photos of everything coz I lost my phone in a cab last night and the driver just dropped it off at my house!

October12013
Really enjoying climbing in these pants I bought for work. It’s the first and only time I’ll get to wear them at work since they don’t fit the uniform policy which apparently exists. You learn something new everyday.

Really enjoying climbing in these pants I bought for work. It’s the first and only time I’ll get to wear them at work since they don’t fit the uniform policy which apparently exists. You learn something new everyday.

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